Some Ramblings About The Nature Of Storytelling and Identity

Life is dictated by the individual and judged by the masses. 

A millions voices voicing concerns, we live in an age of gossip and madness. Where people's narcissism leads to power over others through shaming and violence. People calling other people bad names while accusing those same people of name calling. With so many opinions one must turn to principles to navigate the sea of ideas. 

Are stories about how to act the substructure of conscious integration? Information fed through the language and meaning factory of the brain that develops and coalesces into an identity bound by time. 

Is storytelling so valuable that those who do it well are given status among the masses? Or are good stories so powerful they transcend their original author? They exist in the abstract and recur over time. The lessons learned in stories help the mind grow a sense of potential efficacy in navigating the world and the mind adapts to local information. 

Meaningful stories help integrate information and guide the mind to linking important elements of reality. Archetypes help orient our identities by highlighting actions that can lead to meaningful social and personal outcomes. The degree to which the mind can reconcile the consequences espoused in stories with the real consequences of the world is the degree to which the psyche is stabilized and maneuverable. 

If free will exists then we have to give people the chance to examine the stories that rule their lives and work to determine the validity of the lessons in those stories. One must be skeptical of the stories others tell us about how the world really is and one must be skeptical of one's own ability to deceive one's self by means of wishful thinking and ego stroking. 

Truths evolve. New truths arise and fall but some truths stand the test of time. Stories tell truths with lies but the lies are just metaphors and representations of reality. Meaning exudes from stories coating the mind with a sticky film of understanding.

Art reflects life. Since art is a part of life art sometimes reflects art. Sometimes life reflects art because art is a part of life. Art attempts to point at something either real or only real in the mind, so it can point to anything and everything and make up things to point to or tempt you into seeing something never intended to be pointed at. 

I climb down the ladder (Dream Diary)

02/05/2017 after 12:00 am

I was hanging on for dear life on the top of a narrow cliff outcropping, like a massive bridge to nowhere, high above a rocky shore along with a large crowd of people. All squirming around and trying not to fall. Gary Vaynerchuck was there and was having no problem with the situation at all. There were two others there that I knew; I think they were friends from high school. All of a sudden my two friends lost their respective grips and fell around 50 ft. to the hard ground, the waves lapping across their bodies not quite obscuring them from the view from above. I remember feeling extreme anxiety and fear about the situation and that I would most certainly fall soon.

Not long later I was more composed and began to walk atop the cliff trying to find a way down when I see Gary Vaynerchuck explaining that he was going to simply climb down the face of the cliff free style, because he can do that kind of shit I guess. Then I find a hidden rope ladder, which must be the way all these frantic people got up here in the first place. Duh. I climb down the ladder.


(In the past when I had a dream that embodied anxiety, IE: tsunamis engulfing me, being chased; that kind of thing, I would wake up just as the anxiety reached it's height. This would often manifest as death or falling in the dream but lately my dreams do not stop at the anxiety. I seem to be able to push past the fear trigger and move to a more calm and rational outlook during a dream. This change in dream outcomes may be a result of my general maturation and may represent a change in my outlook on life.)

It was surreal and almost pleasant (Dream Diary)

02/03/2017 after midnight whilst sleeping

Last night I had an amazingly vivid and curious dream. Here are the parts I remember:

It was in the future 20 or so years. I was in a very small apartment with my brother and others. It was in the city I think and it was very cramped. The room was designed to accomplish a lot in a small amount of space. At one point I asked about what I missed and all the technology looked different and weird. There was a TV that had an old fashioned knob that was floating away from the screen. The scene reminded me of "The Fifth Element" or "Blade Runner". (I am reading "Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep".)

At one point I was inspecting a trophy case that had memorabilia and on the left side where remnants of my early contributions to Fractal Focus but instead of being video or photography they were just crafts with symbols and painting of them. Like rocks or pottery that I had decorated. And on the right side I remember looking up at a much bigger set of accomplishments that represented what my brother had done for the business and after that, while I had been gone. The business had come and gone and I had no idea what had happened.

Then It cuts to a big house on a hill with trees surrounding it. I am foggy on the details here but I think it involved family and learning more about what I had missed.

Then I am on a row boat in the ocean where whales are breaching the water very close by. Someone else and I are on our way to find my friend Justin that I haven't seen in the 20 or so years I had been gone. He was being held prisoner on a sub that was parked outside the city. (I saw a sub at OMSI recently and my friend Justin lives on the coast.) When we get to the sub we board the top and I hear something coming from a metal tube sticking out the top of the sub. I hear my friend Justin singing a made up funny song that is coming from a small slit in the side of the tube. I sing back down to him something about being there to see him and I remember coming up with something clever involving my name.

That is what I remember. It wasn't scary. It was like waking up from a coma and realizing the world had gone on without you. It was surreal and almost pleasant.

I expect people I deal with to be respectful

02/03/2017 at 1 am

Yesterday my brother and I had a meeting with a friend about a recent photo shoot and some other design and business stuff. It was a great conversation about future goals and potential collaborations. After the meeting my brother and I talked about what is important in a business relationship and number one is communication. You have to be on the same page from conception to payment or one party might start to attribute intentions and motivations that might not be accurate. It is easy to assume that someone else is disregarding you on purpose but they are more likely just busy, unaware, or sometimes they are straight up unprofessional.

That is why it is important to stay in communication during a project and afterwards to make sure that everyone was happy with the collaboration. Business deals should be win win even when there are compromises are there are always compromises which is why it is also important to set standards. I expect people I deal with to be respectful, prompt and honest. I expect a high degree of integrity from myself and that allows me to expect it of others. I make mistakes but it I am stronger and healthier when I own them and I respect others that strive do the same.

My brother and I also discussed how important it is to be flexible and personable in relationships. In every project you hope will exceed the clients expectations and generate fruitful future business, have some fun and do work that matters. Finding good people who are willing to work with you to further each other's goals is ideal and it is important to not take good collaborators for granted. It is equally important to make sure that you aren't being taken for granted or advantage of. Hence, communication and standards play a major role in developing positive relationships. It's also important to take good advice and not let ego get in the way.

I justed finished watching Bill Burr's new special

02/01/2017 at 12:30 am


I justed finished watching Bill Burr's new special "Walk Your Way Out" with my brother. In this special he utilizes his immense imagination and engaging stage presence to tell stories that seem to be going off the rails at times but always end up on track toward a laugh. That was a lame sentence. (I'll start over.)

The first time I saw Bill Burr was in the early 2000's when he came to my tiny, backwoods, community college. I remember thinking it was amazing and that live comedy was something special. I remember being really stoned and that someone in the audience got kicked out for being a drunk asshole. Since then I have seen a lot of Bill Burr's work from my computer. From his previous special "I'm Sorry You Feel That Way" to his Netflix TV show "F is for Family". He's even in "Breaking Bad" which I'm re-watching now. I love when he is on Joe Rogan's podcast and he has his own podcast where he rants about things.

Bill Burr's special most recent special really was great. It's funny and entertaining and his characters, voices and body language are engaging and hilarious. He takes on taboos with ease and a biting humor and his observations are dark, grounded in reality, playful and maybe a little whimsical. I relate to his sensibilities minus some of the anger. I'd recommend it to anyone who isn't afraid to hear someone speak their mind.

Other than that I went to work earlier and I am becoming more self reliant. I feel like I know the people that work there better and I'm more comfortable helping customers. After work I came home and caught up with my brother about business stuff. A couple things are not going as well as we wish they would. Getting funding from one source didn't work out, a client is late on a payment, our custom e-mails aren't working. Minor things ultimately, but they are frustrating. We have a meeting tomorrow about a previous job and branding. I am excited to see what is next for the business.